By Anthony von Dessauer
Arriving to the Land of Bitcoin
It all started in the DMs. I told Sean that I supported what he was doing and would do my best to promote his El Salvador Halving party. And in my heart I asked myself,
“How cool would that be to celebrate the Halving in El Salvador with my friends at a Meme Factory party?” I had pretty much expressed as much to Sean. Stackchain was still going strong, Stackchain Magazine was just getting started with Volume 1 and Block 2 finding its way into the hands of excited plebs – of course I would support Sean, and The Meme Factory. How could I not do everything in my power to help my friends sell tickets? But as cool as it would be to go myself, I wasn’t so sure. There was a hesitancy. I made excuses in my head. And in the DM’s, Sean asked,
“What’s keeping you from going?”
I didn’t have a real answer, and moments later I stacked a Halving Party ticket to El Salvador, and in true Stackchain fashion, Stachainers stacked tickets in the replies. It was a life changing moment. El Salvado is the land of Bitcoin. And being there when I was there, to see the country and the people as they are at this moment in time, was a blessing. It was inspiring. If you were to ask the average American what they thought the future of America was or what they thought of their own future, the answer would be some variation of,
“It’s not looking good”.
If you ask an El Salvadorian the exact same question, the answer sounds like an anthem of hope. They expect good things to happen. El Salvador is the land of hope. The land of Bitcoin.
I hate flying. I feel like I’m going to die every time. It’s bad. I can visualize the wings falling off and the cabin breaking in two while i get sucked out of the plane, unharmed mind you so that way I can be fully aware of every minute it takes for my impending death as my body plummets towards the earth where it will fall hidden forever in the ocean or splatter like an egg on land. This time was no different, as the plane touched down at El Salvador International Airport. I felt the same sense of relief I always do, that I had in fact not died in a horrible plane crash. I pulled out my phone and switched it off airplane mode where it immediately connected to the local telco, I opened up twitter and told the gang that I was alive, and then I proceeded to disembark into a surprisingly modern airport. I wasn’t sure what I had expected. But I didn’t walk down plane stairs and hitch a ride on an off duty papusa truck with rando locals and their exotic noisy livestock like some kind of Indiana Jones montage (unfortunately). Nope,an airport nicer than the one I left in San Francisco greeted me with great glass vistas and eloquently curved aluminum structures. Girlfriend and I used the restroom and headed to customs and immigration. There was no line. We got though the whole thing in 10-20 minutes, paid our fees using lightning, and got waylaid by the guy that stamped our passport not because of some bureaucratic hitch, or local chicannery, but because he thought it was cool that we came from San Francisco, and when I told him we were going to the Bitcoin Halving Party he wanted to know if “Now was a good time to buy Bitcoin?” I assured him it was always a good time to buy Bitcoin and he was pleased to know that we were excited to see El Salvador. And with a big smile our passports got stamped and we were off to get our bags.
Girlfriend and I arrived early in the morning and the check-in time at the resort wasn’t until 3PM. We had a lot of time to kill. So we made our way out of the airport and pushed through the barking taxi drivers. If you’ve never traveled internationally, pushy scammy taxi drivers are super common. In Mexico you damn near have to cut through them with a machete like you’re bushwhacking through a jungle. In Thailand they’ll tell you your destination is closed but they know a much better place; in El Salvador they had like two or three barkers, no big deal. It didn’t matter, as we weren’t ready for a ride anyhow. Instead we found a Juan Valdez and enjoyed a decent cup of coffee and then decided to have our first papusa.
First of all pupusas are amazing and if you haven’t had one I feel sorry for you for being a culinary orphan. If you are emotionally cripled by the emptiness in your unloved heart, it’s probably because you’ve never had a pupusa. They’re damn good! And Girlfriend and I were in complete and total flavor town. But something else happened, another El Salvador first. We had our first interaction with the lovely people of El Salvador. The ladies that worked the pupuseria didn’t speak a lick of English, not one Yankee word. And the little bit of Spanish that I spoke suddenly turned into a linguistic beast of burden that was abused into carrying the entire contents of my brain and delivering it intact to the nice lady taking our order. We muddled through. I’m fairly certain the papusas we thought we ordered were not the ones that ended up on our plate. But we had no complaints, five stars, would fuck up my way through accidentally ordering them again. And the waitress was a total sweetheart. In fact, while ordering we had the attention of everyone working at the pupusasria who were collectively beaming supportive smiles at us as if we were all in this pupusa ordering cluster fuck together and there’s no place else we’d rather be. The people of El Salvador are not used to tourists, most don’t speak English, but they do speak the language of hospitality in a way that is touchingly genuine and was a common theme in El Salvador. The people of El Salvador are very pleased to meet you – you can feel it.
After pupusas, we had killed maybe an hour. We had coffee, we had food, there really wasn’t much else to do, so we decided to grab an Uber and head to the resort, maybe we’d get lucky and they’d let us check in early? That didn’t happen, more on that later. So now it was time to navigate the aforementioned gambit of taxi drivers, find the location of Uber pick-ups and get our Uber. Yes, Uber works in El Salvador, no it’s not marked anywhere. So, we had to ask the Taxi drivers.
“Hey where do we get the Uber?”
“No Uber here”, the driver replied. He lied, a common trick in the international taxi tool bag. I’m sure right now there’s some visitor exiting SFO trying to get an Uber to San Francisco and one of our asshole cab drivers is explaining to them “no Uber”.
But alas I’m not a noob international traveler; I looked him right in the eye and said,”Yes there is, don’t lie to me man. Where do I get the Uber?” I was ready, I’m pretty much Indiana Jones, but from California. I’m California von Dessauer! I can navigate foreign lands and deal with nerdowells like this master taxi scammer. I’m ready for him to give me his worst and I’ll wear him down with my fearless resolve and he’ll tell me where to pick up the Uber.
Yeah, none of that happened. As soon as I called him out he gave up immediately, almost apologetically and pointed to where you can get an Uber. Turns out it was 40 feet to the left. The area outside the airport is small. I thought it was odd that he gave up so quickly. Like I said, I’ve dealt with scammers all over the world and taxi drivers are the worst. Turns out, without knowing it I just learned something else about El Salvador. El Salvador is extremely safe because of a very large and active police presence. As it was explained to me, El Salvador has three kinds of police. There are the military police that actively hunt down and engage with the gang members that harassed and abused the people for decades. There are civil police, which are the kind of police that you normally see making sure the day-to-day law and order is maintained, and then, there are the tourism police. A police force specifically designed to protect tourists.
When I told that cab driver that I knew he was lying, the reason he didn’t push back is because he got scared. He thought I was going to complain about him to the police. And scamming a tourist is not ok in El Salvador. He could have been fined a few days wages and maybe even told he couldn’t offer rides from the airport anymore. I of course had no intention of ratting him out; I just wanted to know where you get the Uber. But it was my first interaction with law and order in El Salvador. Everywhere you go there is a police presence. That description sounds kind of “police stateish” . I assure you that is not the case. At no point in time did the police presence feel threatening; in fact they tend to be as friendly as every other El Salvadorian (Have you ever had a dude with a loaded shotgun guarding the entrance to a gas station politely hold the door open for you? I have, in El Salvador). The institution of law enforcement is like an emotional landmark here. Every police officer you see is a symbol of how things are ok now having very recently been not ok. The relationship the people have with police is very different in El Salvador than in the United States. I didn’t hear a single criticism about law enforcement from the people of El Salvador, not even one time. It was unilateral praise and appreciation.
So, eventually our Uber driver Edgardo picked us up for what would be a two hour drive to our resort. Edgardo was warm and friendly, and didn’t speak a lick of English, not one Yankee word. The four of us – Egardo, Girlfriend, Google Translate, and I – settled in for the ride. About half way through a lovely trip through the south of the county Edgardo eagerly pulled out his phone while pointing to a misty mountain in the distance. It was the Volcano Santa Anna, and it rose out of the ground like El Salvador’s own Mt Fuji. Then Edgardo, apparently completely unaware of how Uber works, asked us via Google Translate,
“Would you like to go? It’s only about an hour and half away?” This was the first time in my life that an Uber driver had ever offered a detour. Normally Uber is kind of a point A to point B affair. I almost said yes, but having arrived on a red eye we really wanted to check in. We did eventually visit a volcano and while this isn’t that kind of article, I will say it was breathtaking and the people in El Salvador are as connected to their volcanoes as any Hawwian is connected to theirs. Also volcanoes grow a damn fine cup of coffee. Once while stuck in traffic I actually rolled down the window of the car we were in and bought two pounds of coffee from a lady selling on the side of the road. Five Star coffee, would get stuck in traffic to buy again.
Volcano’s aside, Edgardo drove us safely to our destination, where we smacked face first into El Salvador’s recent history and wounded culture. I had previously mentioned the horrific gang violence that had harassed the good people of El Salvador for decades. But what I didn’t mention is how it has left a scar across the country. A cultural wound that exists everywhere you go. We arrived at the resort four or five hours before check-in. Pulling up to a gate house with many guards, the guards didn’t speak a lick of English, not one Yankee word. And our gallant and agreeable Uber driver Edgardo (who spoke as much English as the guards) became our advocate. Those guards had no intention of letting us get anywhere near the resort before check-in time. If you talk to anyone else who went to The Halving Party, they too will have a story about the guards. Edgardo, our Uber driver, fought valiantly on our behalf, and we were able to pay a “day fee” to access the resort early. The fee may have been part of the reason the guards wouldn’t let us pass. But normally you can handle day passes and such at the front desk. These guards wouldn’t even let us on the property, and I suspect this is security policy held over from more dangerous times.
But alas with our friend Edgardo we prevailed and made our way to the resort, where we met our first person that spoke a lick of English. But not enough to progress all the way through the check-in process, Google Translate filled that Grand Canyon sized gap. This article is not going to be a review of the resort. So let me briefly say, it was nice. It was not modern and it wasn’t up to date, but the food was good, and the drinks were cold. And the people were amazing. Of note, we could hear our housekeeper long before she reached our room sweetly singing in Spanish as she cleaned. Every morning as we headed out we would usually pass her by and she would greet us with the most sincere “buenos dias” and then proceed to talk to us in Spanish for a few minutes every morning. I have no idea what she was saying. But it always ended with “mi amours” and it felt like we were being blessed. While she was possibly the sweetest person we met in El Salvador (maybe the whole planet), her friendly disposition was common everywhere we went in the country. People were pleased to meet us.
I had bought our Halving Party tickets and reserved our room at least a year before the actual event. As a result I was unaware that all the ancillary events were happening the week after the party. I booked our trip the week before. This meant that we arrived before most of the Bitcoiners. Luckily Psy and John arrived around the time we did and we had a wonderful few days exploring El Salvador before everyone else showed up.
Bitcoin Beach and Berlin
We had a few days to explore and so we did. Every Bitcoiner knows about Bitcoin Beach. At this point Bitcoin Beach holds almost a mythical status in Bitcoin circles. If you go to El Salvador you must obviously go to Bitcoin Beach. We had the pleasure of being dropped off at Bitcoin Beach by Sandy Waves. Sandy is an amazing Bitcoiner in El Salvador that does a little bit of everything. She can get you a driver, she can get you a tour guide that speaks Yankee, she can even help you move to El Salvador. All of which appears to be a growing industry in El Salvador. But on this particular day she was our ride.
I always tell people there are levels to Bitcoining. Level one is you learn and get off zero. Level two is you meet Bitcoiners online and start doing Bitcoin things, run your own node etc. Then I would finish it up and say level three is meeting Bitcoiners in person. Going to an event and actually hanging out with Bitcoiners,which is the best! But I guess now there’s a level four. Being driven by a Bitcoiner, in Bitcoin county, talking about Bitcoin on the way to Bitcoin Beach seems like a level above just meeting Bitcoiners. When you’re in El Salvador you really are part of the network. Bitcoin is alive here. Sandy told us her Bitcoin story and told us her Bitcoin plan all while driving us to Bitcoin Beach. That’s only an experience you get in El Salvador. Level four.
She dropped us off at the end of a road and hopped out a moment to take us to the actual beach and show us the general direction of things. From there we spent an afternoon on the beach. We got some cold drinks at a little market that had an “aceptar Bitcoin” sign. We ate an amazing meal at an open air restaurant that overlooked the ocean. Girlfriend was happy to get some Tandoori wings, paid for with Bitcoin. Bitcoin was everywhere here. It was painted on the side of buildings, there were signs in the windows, there were public trash cans with the Bitcoin “B”. In fact I think I only used dollars once. I bought a few dollar beers at some random bar and just watched the waves and bikinis go by while enjoying the ocean breeze.
Which brings me to a common criticism. People will often criticize the usage of Bitcoin in El Salvador by saying something like,”Bitcoin isn’t really accepted everywhere”. This is true, but it’s accepted in enough places that you could get by no problem. And the people are aware of it. There were multiple instances on our trip where having Bitcoin wasn’t just a neat financial novelty, but actually got things done. In one instance we had to get a driver last minute and couldn’t get a “Bitcoin driver” so a local hooked us up with a guy that they use. He was “cash only” and when I told him I only had Bitcoin, he accepted it. In another instance a friend had an injury concerning enough to make a trip to the doctor. When it was time to pay their credit/debit cards didn’t work (something that happened frequently in El Salvador) and Bitcoin was used to settle the bill even though Bitcoin wasn’t accepted there. So while it’s true that not every store has “aceptar Bitcoin” in their window, the ability to use Bitcoin is just under the surface. Also comparatively, where I live I can’t use Bitcoin to buy anything, as opposed to El Salvador where 90% of my spending was Bitcoin. So while the criticism is technically true, Bitcoin isn’t accepted everywhere,you can Bitcoin here just fine.
Speaking of Bitcoin, our trip to Bitcoin Beach ended at The Bitcoin Hardware Store. It’s just a little place up the road but you can’t miss the orange sign. It was pretty awesome. And to be clear the use of the term “hardware” means computer hardware, not screws and drywall. All the Bitcoin tech that you look at online while you can’t decide what to get, is here, so you can look at it all in meatspace while you can’t decide what to get. I eventually settled on some steel plates, a seed punch kit, a shirt, and some local coffee beans. The store is an icon of the community; it doesn’t just sell Bitcoin hardware but it’s a place to go where locals can ask questions. So not only can you buy the hardware needed for a Seed Signer, but you can ask questions about it face to face. Imagine how nice it would have been to have had a physical place to go to ask questions about building your first node? That’s the Bitcoin Hardware Store in a nutshell. I’m still geeking out over it. In my opinion a trip to Bitcoin Beach isn’t complete if you don’t go to the Bitcoin Hardware Store.
In general, Bitcoin Beach had exactly the chill vibe you would hope it had. The presence of Bitcoin ranged from a sign in a local market, to new construction built by new money flowing into El Salvador and landing on the sandy shores. It wasn’t just nice – it was Bitcoin nice. Our trip to Berlin, also nice, was an entirely different Experience. First of all Berlin is a local spot, a little bigger than a village, but not a bustling town. Berlin still bears the scars of gang violence. All of its little buildings had the characteristic iron doors and barred windows. Pretty much everything in El Salvador built prior to Bukele and Bitcoin looks like this. Which made it different from Bitcoin Beach and its extension Surf City where there were glass store fronts. None of that existed in Berlin. Also Berlin was in the mountains; it was the only place where I stopped sweating when I was in El Salvador. The air was crisp and cool and you could breathe it, as opposed to the flat land where you drank every breath.
Our first stop in Berlin was at Bitcoin Berlin, the building where the Bitcoiners who devoted themselves to the people of Berlin, Bitcoined. @JewTXO_92 was kind enough to give us a tour (which we got on video, documentary hopefully in the future sometime) and we learned so much. The Center provides the people of Berlin with a physical place to go and learn about Bitcoin, technology, English; there’s a podcast studio, pretty much everything the people of Berlin could need to learn how to build a circular Bitcoin economy. When you pull out Bitcoin maps to find local businesses that accept Bitcoin, Berlin lights up with merchants happy to receive sats and it’s because of the hard work being done at the Bitcoin Berlin Center.
I had the great pleasure of visiting Berlin not only with Girlfriend, but also Psy and John and their lovely wives. The six of us explored Berlin following Bitcoin maps from one group of merchants to another leaving behind a trail of sats and smiles. As I previously mentioned we arrived before most of the other Bitcoiners that were headed to the party, so we had Berlin to ourselves. Right across from the Center was a little grocery store. I had the pleasure of watching Girlfriend buy drinks and snacks with Bitcoin. She’s a Bitcoiner by osmosis, by having sat in the room while I do spaces and traveling with me when I go to conferences she couldn’t help but learn about Bitcoin. She’s not part of the laser eyed maxi cult like the rest of us. But right there in El Salvador my baby bought groceries in a country where she didn’t speak the language with Bitcoin using Lightning without any issues. She’s never Tweeted a single Tweet on BT and she’s level four. I’m lucky, a lot of us are still trying to get our better halves on board. Pro tip, take them to El Salvador.
In general going to El Slavador pretty much destroys all Bitcoin FUD. It’s hard to argue against Bitcoin when you are floating in a sea of Bitcoin use cases. And not just Bitcoin FUD but Lightning FUD also gets obliterated. Every Bitcoin transaction there was a Lightning transaction. Many of them were directly from my node. Although there were times where my node didn’t connect so I just used Speed Wallet, and once or twice, I even used Cash App. Most people in El Salvador used Blink Wallet. But there were others. And they all pretty much worked fine. Blue Wallet connected to my node at home, Blink Wallet based in El Salvador, and Cash App, a great big American corporation’s wallet, along with many others, all worked and interoperated with each other with no real problems.
But back to Berlin, the six of us ate at a delightful cafe where I scored some coffee beans for Loko, and we shopped around town buying things with sats. One of my favorite transactions happened in what looked like a town square. There was no electricity that I could see; it was like a flea market. Or maybe a local farmers’ market. There was a little stall that had an “aceptar Bitcoin” sticker and an abuelita was selling trinkets and little things that were perfect for souvenirs to give as gifts back home. I grabbed a dozen little keepsakes and pulled out my phone to pay, and without hesitation this little old lady pulled her phone out and brought up a Lightning invoice. Crazy, I went to a country where I don’t speak the language, to a mountain town that looks like it might not always have electricity, went to the town square and bought souvenirs from an old lady using Lightning.
The six of us had an amazing time in Berlin. Berlin was such a fantastic experience, which as a Bitcoiner I would say that visiting there is as important as visiting Beach Bitcoin. What is being done in Berlin is as important as what was done in El Zonte, and you really want to be a part of it.
The Halving Party
Last but not least, The Halving Party itself. Hands down the best Bitcoin event I’ve ever been to. The Meme Factory killed it. Let me set the stage by explaining the layout of the resort. First of all it was at a resort, so food and drinks were included and everyone was staying at the same place. So it wasn’t like a conference where everyone went to a hotel at 4pm and maybe you went to dinner with a few Bitcoiners. All the Bitcoiners were there the whole time. Drinking, swimming, drinking, talking, drinking, and drinking. The resort stretched across a span of beach and had several pools and bars. There was one particular pool and bar in the middle that became home base for the Stackchain/DSB gangs and I’m not sure but I think our two meme gangs signed some kind of gang treaty there because ever since we’ve been crossing streams. Psy and I made it our personal mission to orange pill all the bartenders and I’m pretty sure we got each and every single one.
On a side note: Bitcoin conversations in El Salvador with normies go a lot smoother. In the United States talking to normies about Bitcoin is so annoying I don’t even do it anymore. Everyone thinks they’re an expert, and it’s all about the dollars. In El Salvador the people have a greater base level awareness. And when I explain that I’m visiting because of Bitcoin, they don’t have an “I’m an expert” attitude and you can actually have a productive conversion. Go figure, in a land where most people don’t speak English, not even one Yankee word, Bitcoin conversations are more productive.
So yeah, every damn bartender at the resort was orange pilled, and I’m guessing they all made more in sats that week than they did in wages. And each and every single one of them went home to their families and had good things to say about Bitoiners. Also our drinks were really good.
The Party itself had a conference vibe during the day, where speakers spoke in a conference room. In the back were vendor tables. Proof of Ink and Stackchain Magazaine had one of those tables and the first day we sold all the mags that were brought. In true Stackchain fashion when we showed up the second day, our table was mysteriously gone. Apparently we were too loud and we didn’t get the message when we were told fourty fucking times to shut the fuck up. We couldn’t help it that we had the best table there. Also Sean, if you’re reading this, it was probably mostly my fault. Sorry.
For me the highlight of the conference part was seeing the debut of The Maxi Club show. Hanging out with my meme gang buddies and seeing them in cartoon form on a movie screen was pretty legendary. But for the most part during the conference time I was talking to plebs about the magazine and making sure everyone got a Greg shirt.
Now the actual party part of the party was epic. The highlight of every conference isn’t the speakers, or the workshops, or the booths. All of which are great but pale in comparison to hanging out with plebs. On that front The Meme Factory killed it. They maximized hanging out with plebs. Whether it was exploring the nation of El Salvador with close friends or sitting on a seawall until the wee hours drinking with the meme gangs, or just sharing a meal, the Meme Factory provided for superior fellowship with Bitcoiners. Which brings me to what was the highlight of my trip to El Salvador.
Let me set the stage. On the sandy shores of El Salvador the sun sets into the ocean casting an orange glow on us all like the sun itself is blessing us Bitcoin style. Bitcoiners sit in chairs in front of a stage where not long ago Max Kaiser trumped the glory of Bitcoin country as helicopters thundered overhead. As the sunlight dims, the lights around the stage become brighter and the logo of the Halving Party becomes more visible in the background. And a masked shadowy figure takes the stage. It seems to be a man, A man who commands the presence of the entire shoreline. No wait. It’s not a man. It’s a muppet, a golden Adonis of a muppet. Perhaps the greatest muppet that has ever lived. A muppet who was stitched by the hands of Satoshi himself. The audience is silent in reverence, breathless in anticipation, all you can hear is the gentle waves lapping against the shore. Could this be? Is he really here? Then the muppet speaks,
“Ello?” it says and the crowd erupts in cheers and applause. IT’S YELLOW!! Yellow of The Prophecy! Yellow who stacks amongst us! Yellow who dares to believe! And the heavens open up and a choir of Angels begin strumming a tune, bum bum bummdity bum.
Yes! Yes! A thousand times YES! I BELIEVE!
Stackchainers and DSBers leapt to their feet and overwhelmed security charging the stage. Drunk and profusely sweating we danced like no one was watching, hand in hand, we were as one, singing as loud as we could without regard to whether or not we were a small town girl or a city boy.
“DON’T STOP BELIEVING”
It was epic. Without a doubt one of the best moments of my life. In a world that writes us off, or at best is trying to make a buck. I danced with my friends in Bitcoin country under a setting sun on the shores of El Salvador. We shared a moment that was free. A moment that was real. We opened our hearts and believed like we have never believed before. No fiat, just love.
If you’re a Bitcoiner, you should visit El Salvador. It’s your country. It’s a place where people understand you. It’s a place where you can Bitcoin. A nation gloriously pulling itself out of the ashes in a way that is inspiring and hopeful. Whether it’s an Uber driver eager to make a detour to Santa Ana, a housekeeper sincerely wishing you a good day, an abuelita selling you a trinket, or a Bitcoiner sharing their story as you ride along, the people of El Salvador are pleased to meet you.
For me it started as a DM. Like Sean asked me. I’m asking you.
“What’s keeping you from visiting El Salvador?
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Note from Stackchain Magazine: No Bitcoin (or inferior monies) were exchanged for this article. This article was written by Anthony von Dessauer you can find him on X @anthonydessauer or on nostr anthonyvondessauer@nostrplebs.com. Anthony has been a major contributor to Stackchain from the very first day including hosting stackchain spaces, helping to organize events in meat space and now as a regular contributor to Stackchain Magazine. If you’d like to send Anthony some sats 4 this article you can do so via LNURL valitnikov@stackchainmag.com